I have had two birthdays since my mummy went to heaven and with each birthday my need to celebrate her feels increasing crucial. Now that she’s no longer with me I value her more and more, and I am also exceedingly grateful that she, is (not was) my mom. My mummy was a thirty-three old widow and mother of six children all under eight years of age. She was not allowed to complete her education, yet she is one of the most intelligent people that I know. She had impeccable writing skills and the quality of the presentations she gave at her work make me proud, even today.

My mummy believed she could, and she did. She had an abiding faith in God and in her children’s ability to succeed.   Other people’s naysaying seemed to make her more determined that we would succeed. She ensured that I had an excellent education even when the odds seemed to be against us. I picture her as a mother hen fiercely protecting her brood.   Her focus was on ensuring that her children’s needs were met and in the process, she often forwent her own basic needs.

She was my support, my advocate, the one person who kissed my emotional bruises and let me know that I am smart, beautiful, and with a kind heart. She also let me know in no uncertain terms when I messed up. I, even now, when my thoughts and behaviors are below par, can hear her say, “You will wish your cake was dough.” Translated her quote means terrible behavior cannot be undone and have will result in negative consequences. I feel that because of her life experiences, she understood the importance of her children’s mental health.   If we were happy, she was happy; if we were sad, she found a way to make us feel better, and she beamed at our accomplishments.

                     Terrible behavior cannot be undone and will result in negative consequences.

I feel the need to celebrate her on my birthday because without her there would be no me.  Not only would I not be here, but I would not be the person I am today.  When I do my best, assist others, or show acts of kindness, I feel proud because I know that she would be proud.  Also, the times when my thoughts and behavior were regrettable, I see her frown and her disappointed look in my mind’s eye.  Then, I have a conversation with myself about the importance of being true to myself and others and of not allowing the behaviors of others to determine my responses.  My mummy,  through me, will continue to affect the lives of others, millions of others positively.  I pledge to live up to the challenge.

I realize that my mummy not only gave birth to me, but my very being, who I am, and what I have become is due primarily to her influence.  So today, on my birthday, I celebrate her. I wish I thought of celebrating her on my birthday while she was with me. I vouch to live each day in her honor. This means that I will be considerate of others, more helpful to others and live my best life in her honor.

She was my support, my advocate, the one person who kissed my emotional bruises.